Naomi the Wordsmith

1. Be wrapped up tight when you’re a baby to trick you into thinking your mum is hugging you so you can finally sleep and give your mum some peace and quiet.

2. Read in the hopes of getting sleepy only you never stop thinking “one more page”. You finish the book at 6am and think “better get up now”.

3. I do this one when my pain is bad – Play video games because you know the pain’s too bad to sleep and you may as well have some distraction.

4. Have a really boring tv show on because white noise creeps you out from the first time you ever heard it as a baby from a giant teddy bear that emitted white noise that made you cry.

5. Lie in the pitch black until you think you see a shadow moving and get really freaked out.

6. Start counting sheep, your breaths, anything, and get angry when it doesn’t work.

7. Visualise being asleep. Doesn’t work.

8. Drink coffee. Definitely not recommended, but one time I fell asleep half an hour after a cuppa and slept for five hours.

9. Stay up for over twenty-four hours, for a sleep study test. Works, but not during the sleep study. Finally works when back at home and you sleep for 14 hours.

Try these tips for very bad luck sleeping tonight.

I’ve nearly finished the post on social proof and how to use it. Just didn’t want to edit it while I’m so sleep-deprived my eyes feel like they have to be propped up with matchsticks. Keep an eye out for it dropping into your inbox soon!

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